Category Archives: Empowerment

Fluid Design: Allowing your Space to Evolve with your Perpetually Changing Self.

07 Thursday Nov 2013

Posted by in Emotional Design, Empowerment, Evolution, Fluid Design, Intuition, judgement, Life Designed, positive reinforcement

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Every time my in-laws come over, they are always astounded at the changes that have occurred since they last visited. And each time they’d ask why, I would say, “I’ve always been this way!” In the three years that I have lived in this apartment, I have changed the space at least 20 times. When I’m not painting or refinishing, I am redesigning, refining or reconfiguring and many times it can be a combination of all occurring concurrently.

So this last weekend when they visited, I was once again reminded of my ever evolving space, except that this time they just inquired about what was new to the space. They did not ask why but rather seemed excited at the prospect of seeing what new design component we were able to integrate.

My excitement by their interest quickly evolved into deep introspection, thinking of this continual need for change. I was sitting with a friend talking about this very issue as he perceived his changing space as an inability to commit.  While the latter could be true, I posed this question to him,

“If you’re constantly changing with the experiences of living, why do you assume that your space would not do the same?”

Are you ever the same person as you were a second or a moment ago? And subsequently, do you limit your creative prowess by closing yourself off to fluid change?

I always cringe when I hear people say “I know myself” and I usually follow the statement with “You know yourself to this point”; And even then, most of who we perceive ourselves to be in premised on who we were.

Within our discomfort of the unknown, are we willing to sacrifice the exponential possibilities, of which we are, in pursuit of limiting ourselves in confinement to whom we were or who we should be?

Many clients come into the process detached from this idea of fluid design. It’s usually a yearn to address everything in one swoop, not being cognizant of the fact that by the time we’re done, they would have changed.  The essence of design is to create, and creating is a conversation with your external self getting to know the essence of your soul.

Allowing the design of your space to evolve is to partake in a deeper conversation with yourself, about yourself.

I am always intrigued at art exhibits with people’s fascination with the composition of a piece rather than an interest in what the piece says about the state of being for the artist, when it was created. I look at it this way; we live our lives continually absorbing and assimilating the information of our experiences not always fully conscious of what we’re taking in and how it affects our way of being. When we create, we are accessing that life data and using it to inform our expression.

This expression of unconscious and conscious truth lets us understand ourselves unmasked. The work of art, or in this case, your space, is telling you more about yourself and your experience than you may be fully aware of.

 “It is that openness to experience and change that provides insight on our capacity to grow and evolve.”

Because you are continually changing and evolving, your space has to grow in a manner that is consistent with who you are right now. Design cannot be static, because creating is not. It is a manifestation of fluid creativity!  It draws on multiple influences, infusing into its DNA and speaks to a life, experienced. And it does so, on a perpetual loop, throughout time. If we are to have spaces that mirror our changing selves, we must be flexible and willing to evolve with that ongoing change.

And that change doesn’t have to be about bringing new furnishings or accessories into a space. It may be about resetting the energy of a space by seeing the room in a new configuration. Intuition plays a big part in affording you the possibilities of precognition; the ability to translate feeling into being.

Fluid design is driven by intuitive response and the capacity to be aware of it, the capacity to listen to it and the capacity to translate it.

So next time you feel the impulse to change things up, add  a new furnishing or accessory or reconfigure your space, don’t judge yourself on who you’re supposed to be. Allow yourself to feel your way through what feels right and your space will be honest in reflecting back to you, who you really are.

Find your voice, within a life designed, One room at a time!

Sex Designed: 13 Design Aspects that can Heighten the Experience of Making Love

27 Sunday Oct 2013

Posted by in Changing Perception, Design, Design with Drama, Emotional Design, Empowerment, Inspiration, Life Designed, Music and Design, positive reinforcement, ROmance, Setting the Mood, Sex and Design, Sex Designed, Sexy Design

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*Please press play on the music before you begin to read!”

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Candle light room

Candles burn dimly with a hint of Jasmine and brown sugar in the air. The room is dark with just enough light to see and caress the silhouette of a body as the intoxicating chants of India echoes in the background. The haunting vocal layered over a tribal-like bass is rhythmic and you can feel the fluid movement of your bodies. It’s warm and you feel the tug of the sheets as your feet pushes the comforter to the floor. Your hands reach out across the bed, intertwined and you can feel the warmth of breathe, breathing into the side of your neck.  And then, whispered words…

You’ve harnessed the feeling and energy of your space!

Every choice we make ads to the richness and experience of life and love-making happens to be one of the great joys of living. The right design, in the right setting, with the right ambiance and the right person can set the stage perfectly, for unimaginable romance. It’s indescribable!!

We’re conscious of our sex appeal as it pertains to our physical selves but do we take the time to translate our sexuality and sensuality into our spaces?

When it comes to creating the right environment for love-making, are you secure and empowered in your sexuality, in your personal space?

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Master bedroom

Nothing makes me feel sexier than living in a beautiful space that I’ve had a part of creating. It is the external manifestation of the beauty within that positively reinforces my sense of self. If I can see and appreciate the beauty created of myself, for myself, I can be confident in just being me! The expression of self that comes through is true to my energy, fluid and consistent with my experience. For me to readily access my feelings, to genuinely express my emotions, I need to exist in an environment that empowers me to be confident  in who I am.

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Metropolitan Museum

Some may ask, how do you interpret “sexy”  into a space? When we think of the human body, sexy can come from form, scale, color, texture and proportion. A room conforms to the same criteria and follows the same sensory stimuli as the human form.

 A well designed room, that is authentic to its inhabitant, is like a well dressed person secure in their sexuality.

When I think of a “sexy” space, I think of aspects that pertain to texture, dimension, form, depth, volume, saturation, shape and contrast.  More specifically, I think about the things I love; the things that stimulate my senses:

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Soft Fabrics

1. I love luxurious looking, soft fabrics that feel great against the skin and makes a space seem that more opulent e.g.  velvet, silk, faux furs and  soft cottons

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Color Contrast

2. I love vivid color that gives a room richness and depth. It’s amazing how beautiful everything  looks in a stunning space.

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating

3.  I love soft light that projects a glow on every surface in the room. It cast the right shadows and gives the room a definite mood.

Blue room

4. I love long, flowing drapes that play with volume and height and adds to the drama and romance  of a space.

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: MIrrored wall

5. I love reflective surfaces that bounce light around the room and gives a space exponential depth

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Chandelier

6. I love crystal and metal finishes as each can add an element of glamour to a room

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Flowers

7. I love the shapes , scents and colors of flowers. They bring life to a space, providing visual and aromatic appeal.

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Lamps

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Jewelry light fixtures

8. I love the form and texture in beautiful lamps and lighting fixtures. The right lighting can act similarly to a great piece of  jewelry.

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Pillows
9. I love the exotic feel of patterned pillows and the depth they provide when the fabrics and prints are mixed

MIchael Raun Home Interior design and Decorating: Scented Candles

10. I love non-aggressive,  nicely scented candles that act as a great backdrop to awesome décor. It informs the space and the moment by stimulating your sense of smell.

11. I love hearing sensual music and sounds that set the mood by relaxing the mind. They echo the design of the room and act as a liaison between the energy of the space and the energy that you embody.

Michael Raun Home Interior Design and Decorating: ELLE Decor Feature

12. I love intricate moldings reminiscent of another area that add to the romance of a space. If you don’t have these features, you can add them with paint or by adding molding to your walls.

Michael Raun Home INterior design and decorating: Jonathan Adler Designs Michael Raun Home INterior design and decorating: Jonathan Adler 2

13. And finally, I love a space with humor that integrates accessories that allows it to be light-hearted and accessible in feel.

A heightened state of being, where the bodies and minds are stimulated on multiple levels, can make for great sex.  From the lighting, to the scents, to the colors and textures, the right design can be a catalyst to great love-making.

Find your voice, within a life designed, one room at a time!

Resetting the Energy of your Space.

20 Friday Sep 2013

Posted by in Empowerment

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Life can sometimes be consumed by negative energy usually derived from some suffering – Stress and attachment to name a few. People in our lives, the physical environments we live in and our metal state of being can affect how we perceive the world; of how it was, how it is and how it will be. As humans, we are receptive to that energy around us and should be aware of how it affects our way of being. It is for that reason that I am a firm believer in continually harnessing and recycling all the positive energy life has to give.

It is within our individual and collective reach to shape the world we want to exist in, and it usually begins by first being engaged in our own lives- our personal, physical space. If home is where the heart is, then it has to be a place that exudes love for you.

For me, home has been and is a sanctuary; a refuge where I can escape all the externalities of the outside world to find alignment with myself. It is the singular place that most reflects the essence of who I am. That’s why I find it so important to invest the time and work to create a space that continually feeds my spirit. Resetting my space reinvigorates and renews the energy of my home, and in turn gives the positive reinforcement I need to excel and succeed.

How do you know that your space is in desperate need of a reset? Well, when you begin to feel stagnant, unhappy or uninspired in your space, it’s time to make a change. Many times, your internal emotional wellbeing will manifest itself in your physical space – A cluttered home is a cluttered mind.

Change begins by reevaluating who you are at this point and how you can translate your happiness into your home. Who you were at a different point in time, is not who you are at this point in your life. That means that you need to be cognoscente of shifts in your being and aware of what brings you happiness and unhappiness. In the grand scheme of things, defining your space to mirror who you really are, when you are aligned with your true self, is essential to living your best life.

Resetting can be an easy process of taking inventory of your emotional receptiveness to the things you have in your life and defining a new perception of how you want them to be presented collectively to best reaffirm the joy of living.

Tip: Change Wall Color to best showcase furnishings

Things have a way of taking on a different life when you contextualize them to a cohesive color story.  Wall colors like blues and grays work well with wood tones and as the perfect backdrop to vibrant colors.

If you find that you have an eclectic mix of colorful furnishings, painting the walls a stark white is an awesome way of showcasing your pieces and allowing them to build a narrative. Much like a gallery effect, white walls allow the pieces to be the star.

Tip 2: Change accessories seasonally

Changing out accessories is also an effective way of translating the season throughout your space. It is also a great way of rotating many your favorite items, allowing each to shine on its own for a period of time without having too many pieces grouped together. In addition,  using flowers and plants  is a  great way of finishing a space by adding color and greenery.

Tip 3: Reconfigure your space

Other than changing your wall color and accessorizing, reconfiguring your layout is an effective way of resetting your space. Feel your way through the process by being reactive to your visceral response to placement. Also allow yourself to be free enough to play with new and interesting configurations. The payoff to thinking outside the box can be huge when you open yourself to entertaining new ways of placement. A new space plan creates a new perception, giving a room a new dynamic energy – a source of positive energy that will inspire you in every facet of your life.

Find your voice, within a life designed, one room at a time!

The Beauty of Emotion

30 Tuesday Jul 2013

Posted by in Design, Emotional Design, Empowerment, Inspiration, Language of Emotion, Life Designed, Nature, Physical World

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“I came into this world on the fringes, born of a broken love, marked and scared by a hurt set into motion long before my first breath.”  

I was born into a struggle I could not avoid, destined to be my life’s challenge, spending each and every moment convincing myself that I am worthy, that I am good enough;  good enough for me, good enough for them, good enough to have a place in this world. Thrust into a world without my parents present and accessible, I was introduced and dysfunctionally nurtured by this marginal state of being. I yearned for a sense of belonging, constantly questioning why and how, set on a journey with no map, going in no direction.

At my core was an empty spirit space, surrounded by walls built on mistrust, firmly held together by my fear of abandonment and no matter how I tried, no matter who else tried, nothing could repair the loss of that which I never had. I lived in a reactive state, with no sense of being, no real sense of self.

As a child, I imagined reality as I wanted it to be, the framework to a life built on constructs of a young mind. I found refuge in imagination, forged relationships with the inanimate and began to understand, relate to and converse with the physical world around me. Things were and just are; no pretense, no disappointment. I could understand them more than I could understand people, more than I could understand myself.

If you quiet your thoughts from all the external noise just enough to hear the  physical world’s echoing voice and see its true, enduring beauty, you’ll begin to understand the language of emotion. Where people could not speak to my soul authentically with this language, the physical environment spoke to me through color, and texture,  and shapes. This, I later came to realize, was and is the way through which I would speak to the world around me.

I found purpose in my passion for design, life-design; life designed. I found strength and assuredness in my creative voice. I began to feel worthy because a collective something was listening, speaking to me. I felt like I was not alone! My identity to that point was premised on who I came from, what they could not give and not on what I was born into; a world of extraordinary beauty with a higher consciousness that spoke to my spirit. I surrender to that voice!

I lived my pain, in the shadow of my self; faceless, voiceless, hiding in the shame of my parents past, limited in possibility by what I did not have. And only when I was able to find my language, to speak that language, was I able to hear my voice, resounding, loud and clear. I could intimately speak the language of my conscious self.

Underlying the beauty of things is a stream of emotion that transcends the physical and speaks to the soul.  A life, openly communicating with the physical space, the backdrop to life’s experiences, of each memory, is a life that allows the world around me to speak to me, about me – “I am not alone, you are not alone, and we deserve to be here, to be heard, to be happy.”

On this journey, find your voice within a life designed, one room at a time!

“Find your voice, within a life designed, one room at a time.”

03 Wednesday Jul 2013

Posted by in Empowerment

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I started my design business under the precept that the modern woman has a very different value system as compared to maybe the women of my grandmother’s era. Today’s woman, professional woman, all woman, characterizes a new definition of femininity, defined with no limits. I stand in awe at this real life “Wonder Woman”.

And then as I sat down for the initial consult with many of my clients, I began to understand a woman articulating the same fears, the same concerns, the same wants of any woman, at any time. I felt her expressing her truth, as concisely, as honestly, as openly, as any woman could at any point in time.  I realized early on that I was privileged by what I do. I had a front row seat to an intimate show aptly titled, “The Identity of a Woman”.

I had a personal connection to understanding that woman. Hearing her wants, her fears actualized and verbalized, could help me reconcile my past. For years I had a skewed perception of my mother, and of this identity. In the mind of a child, and for that matter, in the mind of an adult emotionally stuck at a point in childhood, I kept asking myself, “If women are maternal creatures and protectors, why did my mother leave me when I needed her most, abandoned to that kind of love only a mother could give, creating a void that no one else could fill?”

On the road to discovery, somewhere between the past, the hurt, and the now, I came upon “self”; a loner, aimlessly walking, hoping to be found and guided back to meaning and purpose. It felt unwanted; I felt invalidated! I carried the burden of rejection, used it to feed my insecurities and fears and allowed myself to be mired in my dysfunction; too weak to take the time to find and connect to my “self”. But I was soon reminded this was and is the story of my clients, the story of many women, the story of my mother. Amidst their unfolding narratives, experiences expressed with great emotion, each client poignantly gave me insight to a woman’s mindset:

“I feel like I am not enough!”

“I don’t take time for myself!”

“Where am I in the equation?”

“I need a change!”

“I don’t feel like my space reflects who I am.”

I never would have guessed that my life-design would come full circle by being present, spiritually accessible, so connected to what I do through understanding other people’s experiences. And that to me is the essence of progressive womanhood. These modern mothers, wives, professionals, friends and lovers are on a movement toward an alignment with self and being cognoscente of the all-encompassing human experience we share. Against that, and more relevant to my mother’s situation, I also realized that if you don’t have a sense of self, you can’t give that which you didn’t know, at that point. I was blaming her for not being able to give me what I already had and have, my sense of self.

Beyond the aesthetics is an underlying emotional current, driving our impulses, our receptiveness to life and experience. And what I’ve learned, within my design cognition, is that the modern woman defines herself with a greater yearn for connecting with her “self”, even though she holds to many traditional values. I imagine she’s saying to herself, “I can get married, have children, run a household, be professionally successful, have an opinion that counts and most of all, make time for myself.”

With the ability to think freely and live in a world progressively stripped of oppressive social conditioning, the modern woman is at a point where she can define her life by who she truly is, rather than by what she is not. In the wake of my initial uncomfortable feelings toward a client’s tearful expression of gratitude, I am consistently reminded that she’s not just crying or being happy for a pretty room, but rather, she is seeing her “self” actualized in her space. Imagine how it feels to wear a pretty dress and the feeling you get from being confident about yourself? Now magnify that one thousand times as you find yourself engulfed by a space that positively reinforces all that you are.

On this journey, find your voice within a life designed, one room at a time.